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Adam's note - Scapegoat was a band my friend Tanner and I formed in 8th grade during algebra class. Every few years when we're in the same city, we write and record a few new songs. We are not limited by such factors as good taste, high class, or listenability. Doorbell Ditching at the Pearly Gates by Scapegoat (Selzer/Strutzenberg) Scapegoat was formed half a lifetime ago in an Iowa algebra class instead of playing attention they wrote songs about slushees and laughed And then when the supervolcano blew up the west hemipshere Scapegoat ascended to heaven and said "man what are we doing here?" They went doorbell ditching at the pearly gates ringing the bell and running like hell up at the pearly gates Saint Peter caught up to Scapegoat as they ran through the circles of hell He said "don't worry boys, come on back here you guys have done very well Algebra's really satanic and all mathematicians are damned but everyone up here in heaven is a really hardcore scapegoat fan!" so come doorbell ditching at the pearly gates ring our bell and run like hell up at the pearly gates he said "you get free fries at mcdonalds and on sundays a free milkshake too and jesus has all of your records and he can't wait to hang out with you and make prank phone calls to the devil and maybe record a few songs but I'll keep him out of your hair boys if you don't want him tagging him along" when you're doorbell ditching at the pearly gates ringing the bell and running like hell here at the pearly gates "Now that you guys are in heaven you can teach us to have fun we may not quite understand fart jokes but we'd all love to goose a few nuns In heaven you won't find TI-85s but slushees rain down from the sky there's nudity in every movie masturbation will not make you blind!" Doorbell ditching at the pearly gates ringing the bell and running like hell up at the pearly gates As the heavenly host sang "all these shlushees in front of me so many slushees it hurts to pee all these slushees for me to see how many slushees can there be?" |
CONTACT: Adam Selzer AIM: AdamSelzer236 Be a Fan on Facebook!  |